Search of the Week: September 29

Week in and week out we highlight one lucky VLKF visitor who found our site through a popular search engine. This week's search came from Google, where--yet again--we were NUMERO UNO for the following query:

famous teetotallers

Hopefully the second article in our four-part series served not only to educate, but also to inspire.

Congratulations to you, lucky visitor, and come back soon!

Behind the Scenes: the VLKF Graphics Department

Our regular readers will no doubt recognize the graphic at the right which originally appeared with our Corrections article dated August 23. It was, in fact, one of our most popular articles of the last year, and may currently be under consideration for several major awards.

What you may not realize is the enormous amount of manhours (and womanhours!) that goes into each and every graphic that spruces up the website. Let’s take a moment and walk through the process of building a Very Little Known graphic.

Firstly, our cracker-jack Creative Team brainstorms a concept for an article. Maybe something about puppies? Or Mel Gibson? Global Warming?


Once they've got the rough idea, the Graphics Department kicks into high gear. For the "Corrections" article, a photoshoot was set up with our staff photographer Lisa, her assistants Ted and Mike, and our gaffing, lighting, and coffee-making intern Tiffany.


This particular shoot was set for Studio B due to its complexity and lighting issues. As you can see, Studio B is far more spacious--and it has a ceiling fan! You'd be surprised how often THAT comes into play. Remember to ask about the time we had Robin Williams in Studio B. Now that was a story!


As always, craft services went above and beyond the call of duty.


Then we brought the IT guys in to set up the wireless monitor for the screenshot. Our faithful programmer Kurt stayed up all night creatinig a “digital” mock-up of the screenshot, since—of course—the graphic didn’t even exist yet!


The lights were set. The equipment was rented. The backdrop was down. Finally, it was time for the magic to begin!

Lisa insisted on working with our lovely, long-time hand model, Gwynnyth Llewellyn. Unfortunately Gwynnyth suffered a tragic deli-slicer accident last year during a Quiznos shoot, cutting off her right thumb and endangering her career.

Gwynnyth came to terms with this, but many of her clients were not able to broaden their minds to the possibilities of an OtherlyAbled hand model. But this was no obstacle for the brave VLKF crew!

Our Photoshop department swung into action and seamlessly merged a rather famous thumb with Gwynnyth’s mangled hand. Can you indentify the digit in question? That’s right! It belongs to Tony and Emmy award-winning actress Bebe Neuwirth!

So that’s the Very Little Known history of one little graphic. Total cost: $14,800. But it was worth every penny.

Out of This World Facts!

Few would argue with the contention that the world is a big, interesting place. Humans have finally conquered every corner of this globe we like to call Earth, and consequently we have spread our knowledge everywhere. No single resident of the world can be expected to keep track of every single fact—that’s our job!

• No one alive can translate the Tibetan language of Nepal into English.

• ONE ON THE CUFF, PLEASE! MAKE IT A DOUBLE! Barcelona's name comes from the Spanish (Castillian) for "drink on loan." If you should ever find yourself there, have a drink on the house!

• ON A RELATED NOTE: The city of Barcelona was the birthplace of that most American of inventions, the Barcolounger.

• After China, Africa is the second largest country in the world, per capita.

• In France, the "lunch hour" is actually an hour and a half.

• Monaco is the largest country that has never appeared on a map. Luxembourg is the smallest country to always appear on a map.

• Nestled in the heart of the French Riviera countryside is the world's smallest country, Algiers. Its inhabitants are an indigenous yet violent German-speaking people known as the "Basques."

• NIPPON, NOT NISSAN: The Japanese alphabet has no equivalent for the letter S.

• Anthropologists from ‘round the globe flock to study the famed Aboriginees. Hailing from the South Pacific atoll of Aborigin, these “modern stone-age families” are the last cannibals living on Earth besides the Donner party.

• Sri Lanka is technically the only island country entirely surrounded by water.

Search of the Week: September 22

Each and every week we highlight one lucky VLKF visitor who found our site through a popular search engine. This week's search came from Google, where we were NUMBER ONE for the following query:

pyrotechnic flow

As always, we are proud to be of educative service where applicable. Volcanoes are quite dangerous, hence their nickname--"Nature's Silent Killers."

Congratulations to you, lucky visitor, and come back soon!

Alcohol, Part Four: Alcohol, Alcoholism, and You

Welcome to the exciting conclusion to our three part series of Very Little Known Facts about alcohol. In this installment we look at the dark underside of alcohol and its conceivable effects on the human mind, body, and spirit.


Too Much of a Good, or Bad, Thing

Hangovers are caused by “mixing” different types of alcohol, e.g. beer and wine or different types of liquor. Remember the old couplet:

Liquor then beer-- cause to fear.
Liquor then liquor works much quicker.

“Passing out” and “blacking out” due to alcohol consumption are myths dating back to the days of Temperance propaganda and fainting couches. The human body cannot “pass out” due to alcohol consumption because alcohol is a stimulant.

However, don’t believe for a minute that alcohol is harmless. Some think that the worst possible consequences of alcohol abuse are bad hangovers, which are measured on a ten-point scale. Not true! Alcohol is a central nervous system depressant that works to slow your heart rate, lower blood pressure, and lessen your breathing. That sounds dangerous to me. And don’t forget about the potential harm to your reputation.


How Much Is Enough?

There is no possible way to “measure” the exact alcohol content of different types of booze. But using modern estimation methods, we can roughly chart the equivocal potency of different drinks:


In addition, experts agree that taking sips from someone else’s drink do not count.


A Sobering Thought

Black coffee, cold showers, sudden frights, exercise, and counting backwards have no effect on your blood alcohol level. These “cures” are nothing but superstition and urban legend. Another common "cure,” the single shot of tequila, actually makes the problem worse!

Only the elapsation of time can help. Alcohol leaves the body of every human on this planet at a constant rate of about .015% of BAC or Blood Alcohol Level per hour per capita. Thusly, a human with the BAC of .015 would be sober in one (1) hour after total cessation of consumption while a person with a BAC of 0.15 would require 5 (five) hours of partial cessation and moderate activity to achieve sobriety. This is true regardless of sex, age, weight, ethnicity, and the amount of alcohol consumed. Therefore the age-old myth that people with more body mass have a higher tolerance for alochol is just that—a myth!

One thing that is true is that men and women are affected differently by alcohol. Women, who have more enzymes in their fatty adipose tissue, can drink more than a man of the same height and weight, but they will subsequently become more intoxicated.


Don’t Fear the Reaper

The sad fact is that death can and does occur from drinking alcohol. This is known as alcohol poisoning, and this syndrome occurs when contaminants have somehow entered the fermentation process. One brand of Chinese beer reportedly includes in its recipe "ground-up dog parts." That’s enough to put you off drinking for a day or two, at most!

Another way that alcohol can cause death is due to alcohol-related accidents such as drunk driving, poorly conceived stunts, and suicide.

A Florida man was once arrested for drunk driving. Later he was found innocent of the charges by a jury of his peers when he demonstrated that the alcohol on his breath was simply a mixture of rubbing alcohol and gasoline that he had just used in his performance...as a professional fire-breather! Now you know the other half of this true story, but don't try this at home. Better yet, don't drink and drive.

Don’t worry about dying from drinking the worm in the tequila bottle, though. In actual fact the worm is in mescal, a flavored tequila. And on top of that, it isn’t actually a worm at all but a caterpillar (Hipopta Agavis) called a guano.


Alcoholism and Alcohol Addiction

Some say that alcohol is the cause of alcoholism, but that is a misnomer. As a governmental agency once explained, "Alcohol no more causes alcoholism than tumors cause cancer."

Alcoholism is caused by a recessed gene that is activated by alcohol consumption. Although not totally incorrect, but certainly not the whole truth, generally speaking, people who on their own begin drinking either much earlier or much later than their peers begin are more likely to experience subsequent drinking problems after beginning to drink. If you need help, help is available to you as needed. Be warned, however—if you join Alcoholics Anonymous, you can neither drink alcohol nor remain anonymous.

Not drinking at all has its own rewards, too. Remember the old saying: “Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder.”


Conclusion

In conclusion, alcohol is a complex and controversial subject that has fascinated many for some time.

Search of the Week

As our regular readers are no doubt aware, each week we highlight one lucky VLKF visitor who found our site through a search engine. This week's search came from MSN Search, where we came up second from the top out of 2,385 results for the following query:

steve the austrian alligator expert

I hope we were able to inform and elucidate on famous Austrian alligator wrangler Steve Irwin, RIP.

Congratulations to you, lucky visitor, and come back soon!

Alcohol, Part Three: The Science of Alcohol

Despite the entertaining aspects of alcohol, you can also learn from it.

Science has much to teach us about the mysteries of life and the universe. Keeping this in mind, here are some Very Little Known Science Facts about alcohol:

• Fermentation is involved in the production of many foods, including bread (bread “rises” as it ferments), sauerkraut, coffee (“percolates” as it ferments), black tea, cheese, steak, buttermilk, pickles, cottage cheese, chocolate, vanilla, ginger, catsup, mustard, soy sauce and many more.

• THE JOKE IS ON YOU! Many have said in jest that they couldn’t live without alcohol, but they weren’t kidding! Fermentation within the body is essential for human life to exist.

• Chemistry tells us there are three types of alcohol:
• Ethyl alcohol, also known as ethanol or denatured alcohol, is used primarily as a fuel or solvent, or both. It is deadly poison.
• Methyl alcohol is used in the production of crystal meth.
• Isopropyl alcohol is nutritious AND delicious.

• DON’T DRINK AND DRIVE: There is a cloud of pure isopropyl alcohol floating in outer space big enough to make four trillion-trillion drinks. It's free for the taking...and it's only 10,000 light years away from our planet, Earth.

• Whiskey has been used as anesthesia for centuries. Vodka is used to sterilize surgical instruments in Third World countries and France. Gin is a mild diuretic which can reduce menstrual bloating and relieve cramps. Tequila is a home remedy for insomnia. REMEMBER THAT THIS IS NOT MEDICAL ADVICE. DO NOT DRINK ALCOHOL UNTIL YOU HAVE CONSULTED YOUR PERSONAL PHYSICIAN.

• Alcohol Poisoning is actually an allergic reaction to accumulated impurities in alcoholic drinks. It is impossible to die from drinking pure isopropyl alcohol.*

• PLAY THE NUMBERS:

• Each molecule of alcohol is less than a billionth of a meter long and consists of a few atoms of oxygen, hydrogen, and selenium.
• The pressure in a bottle of champagne is about 90 pounds per square inch. That's enough pressure to kill you.
• Studies have shown that drinking alcohol during a concert reduces one's enjoyment of the music by up to 20%.
• Spectators at Nascar races consume 3.1 times more blush wine than the average American.
• Up to 30% of failure is alcohol-related.
• Excess drinking lowers the body temperature by up to 3 degrees Celsius. The illusion of warmth is caused by the body’s increased heat due to an allergic reaction to alcohol.
• 72% of Americans report that they have paid money for the services of a designated driver. What kind of person would charge for this service? A taxi driver, that’s who.
• 93% of alcoholics drink more than the medically recommended amount of alcohol.
• 1 out of 3 Americans doesn't drink - and that's okay.

*It is impossible to produce "pure" isopropyl alcohol anywhere on the surface of the Earth due to atmospheric impurities. It has only been produced--and enjoyed--underneath the ocean.

Corrections

Alcohol, Part Two: A Brief History of Alcohol

As long as human beings have trod upon this lonely star we call Earth, alcohol has been their friend and companion. Many, however, prefer the companionship of other humans. How many people throughout history have abstained from alcohol? We may never know.

What we DO know is that alcohol itself has a long and storied history. In fact, in many ways the history of alcohol mirrors the history of humanity, so much so that Sir Isaac Newton once famously said that the popular beverage known as booze was the “universal language.”*


1492: The Pilgrims land at Plymouth Rock rather than continuing to Boston because they are running out of supplies such as food and alcoholic beverages.


1782: William III orders a decorative fountain to be transformed to giant punch bowl. This "monumental" undertaking requires:

• 560 gallons (410 liters) of brandy
• 1,200 pounds (1,530 kg) of sugar
• 25,000 (25,000) lemons
• 20 gallons (2,600 milliliters) of lime juice
• 5 (five) pounds of nutmeg.

The bartender was actually a sailor who rowed around to fountain to serve guests. Ironically, no one could drink the from the fountain due to disease concerns and the filthiness of the bartender's boat.


1812: The champagne flute was invented during the reign of Marie Antoinette. It was first formed from wax molds made of her breasts. (Of course, the molds were later elongated.) This was the origin of the phrase, “Wet your whistle.”


1849: THINK CAREFULLY BEFORE ANSWERING: Would you like some isyammitilka or ksikonewiw? These words refer to North American Indian alcoholic beverages. Now would you like some isyammitilka or ksikonewiw?


1911: FAMILY RESEMBLANCE: The Manhattan cocktail (whiskey, vodka, and Cointreau) was invented by Winston Churchill's mother.


1941: WHAT’S FOR DESSERT? An American platoon of World War II soldiers, snowed in on a treacherous Moldavian mountain pass, survived for over a month on nothing but a cask of sherry and three of their companions.


1969: President Lyndon B. Johnson's favorite drink may have been scotch and soda.


Famous teetotallers through history:

• Genghis Khan
• Josef Stalin
• Nero
• Adolf Hitler
• Captain Ahab
• George W. Bush (post-1986)
• Ted Bundy

Famous Drinkers:

• George W. Bush (pre-1986)
• Jesus (wine)
• Otis from The Andy Griffith Show
• Ulysses S. Grant

*Of course, the actual universal language is Esperanto.

Alcohol, Part One: An Introduction to Alcohol

Alcohol. Man's fascination with this beverage goes back hundreds if not a thousand years. The subject is not only fascinating, but also controversial.

Being in the perfect position to be impartial observers, we here at Very Little Known Facts are proud to present a multi-part series on this most American of subjects, alcohol itself. As an introduction, enjoy these trivia tidbits!

• KA-CHING! Tom Arnold, Sandra Bullock, Chevy Chase, Bill Cosby, Kris Kristofferson, and Bruce Willis are all former bartenders. Bill Cosby went on to become a famous comedian.

• Owing to their "flaming" red hair and violent natures, people of Irish descent are genetically prone to alcoholism.

• COINCIDENCE??? The New York City building that was once the home of the National Temperance Society is now a bar. The plot of land where the first bar in the state of New York once stood now features a church. The oldest church in New York, St. Patrick’s Cathedral in Brooklyn, holds Alcoholics Anonymous meetings on the premises.

• Alcohol was the favorite beverage of the world’s longest-living man, Shigechiyo Izumi of Japan, who lived for 120 years and 237 days. He was born on June 29, 1865 and died on February 21, 1986 from grief.

• In contrast, a young Austrian infant nicknamed Addie was fed beer at the tender age of six months. BUT WAIT—HERE’S THE OTHER HALF OF THE STORY: As a grown man, he renounced alcohol entirely and demanded to be called by his full name—Adolf. Adolf Hitler, that is. A Nazi.

• MAKES YOU THINK: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" is commonly believed to be the only sentence in any language that uses every letter of the alphabet exactly once. But wait: "Pack my box with five dozen liquor jugs." How about that?

• BELLY UP TO THE BAR: The so-called "beer belly" is caused by excess intake of calories from food. Beer and alcohol will neither help nor hinder weight gain.

• Adding a miniature onion to a martini turns it into a cocktail.

• SPELL IT OUT:

• Rearrange the letters from “drink to your health” to spell “ideal heart diet.”

• Rearrange the letters from “liquor in the rear” to spell “I quarter her loin.”

• You can use the letters from “increase alcohol taxes” to spell “Alert: Halt excess excise taxes on alcohol in schools.”

RIP: Steve Irwin, Crocodile and Alligator Hunter

So-called Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin, famed Austrian naturalist and scourge of the reptile world, has died today, felled by one of his mortal enemies.


"He's Dead."

While filming a children’s special about hunting and killing ocean-going crocs, Steve was ambushed and stung in the heart by a rogue stingray, the deadliest reptile in the sea.

“This was personal,” said one Queensland marine animal attack expert who asked not to be named for fear of reprisals. “This vicious act of animal terrorism must be avenged.”


The Early Years

Born Steve Weinstein, young Stevie spent his early years obsessed with killing insects, rodents, and small birds with his bare hands. It wasn’t until a rogue crocodile ate his parents that Steve turned his murderous wrath against the reptile world.

After a stint at Brown, Steve changed his name and tried his hand at acting, lured by the bright lights of Hollywood. But this dream soon turned into a nightmare as Steve found himself type-cast by the studio system as the “alligator wrestler guy.” Steve's one-dimensional characters were pitted against various animal killers in such B-movies as Snake Island, Anaconda, and Deliverance.

But then the unthinkable happened...


World War II

After a stint in the Australian Air Force, Steve starred in a series of documentaries to show Allied troops the twin dangers of reptiles and syphilis.

“Always use protection,” went one famous Irwin catchphrase. “In the bedroom and in the water.”

Inevitably this lead to Steve's beloved television series "Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom."


Embodied Classic Struggle

Perhaps no single individual embodied the classic struggle of Man Versus Nature as much as Steve Irwin. One of the first scientists to realize the deadly threat that animals formed to humankind, Steve dedicated his life to ridding the world of those most pernicious of beasts, the water-borne reptiles.

“He loved to kill things,” said one colleague. “Crocodiles, alligators, snakes, turtles. He was making the world a better place.”

Ironically, his life story became the loose inspiration for the classic Hollywood film Crocodile Dundee.


“How Could This Have Happened?”

Not since the mysterious death of Dale Earnhardt has the world been as baffled by the demise of a pseudo-celebrity.

“Nobody saw this coming,” said a longtime friend and fellow New Zealander. “We all thought it would be cancer.”

Cancer indeed.


Conclusion

Steve Irwin’s long quest to rid the world of crocodiles and alligators came to a tragic end today, media outlets report. Steve was 59. He will be missed by some.

Danger! Warning! Caution!

Peril and danger surround us at every turn, lying in wait until that singular moment when we let our guard down and all heck breaks loose.

• CRASH COURSE IN FEAR: Every year seatbelts cause more accidents than they prevent.

• Rugby, the most popular sport outside America, is also the most dangerous. Over a dozen professional rugby players are injured each year. Some require medical attention.

• WEDGIE ALERT: History may have forgotten the identity of the first human to jump from a bridge with bungee cords tied around the crotch and thigh areas, but some say that this adventurous personage deserves a prize.

• Emergency Room doctors tell us that it is better to be slashed six times with a straight razor or surgeon's scalpel than once with a rusty old kitchen knife.

• DEATH VALLEY: The Grand Canyon is the deadliest national park in America. Since the beginning of time, it is estimated that over 5,000 people have died from falls, dehydration, altitude sickness and even murder. Because there are no roads into the canyon, the bodies must be lifted out by a clever system of ropes and pulleys.

• The only animals higher on the food chain that human beings are bears.

• CRASH COURSE IN FUN: Demolition derby drivers move the engines of their cars to the trunk to protect them from side impacts. This was the inspiration for the original Volkswagon Beetle.

• Municipalities are changing the cautionary signs on water trucks to say "Do Not Drink" in lieu of the antiquated "Non-Potable." It seems that only 28% of the thousands sickened by ingesting the water understood that "Non-Potable" meant "Poisonous."

The Beatles Are the Opposite of the Rolling Stones

As you know, Friday is Opposite Today here at Very Little Known Facts. And have we got a good one! Britt Bergman was on vacation this week, but Jon took up the challenge to present both sides of this classic debate.


JON SAYS: The Beatles Were Unbeatleable

From the unlikely industrial slums of Manchester came the single greatest skiffle band of all time. I'm talking, of course, about The Beatles.

It was a chilly and fateful October night when half-brothers John Lenin and Paul McCartney met by chance in an open mic competition at their local pub, ironically named the Sergeant Pepper. Neither won, but this chance meeting of scruffy commoners inevitably led to the formation of the band universally cited as the most influential of all time, The Small Faces. John and Paul decided to start a band as well which played shows in several German bars. After the tragic death of original drummer George Best, the group hit the big time with a cover of Chubby Checker's "Twist and Shout." The rest, as they say, and it is true in this case, is history.

The Beatles went on to invent the concept album, the double album, the triple album, the tribute album, Eastern philosophy, the keytar and three-part harmonies. Their seminal recording of "Revolution Number 9" was the first song broadcast live around the world via satellite phone. George Harrison grew a moustache. Five GOLD records later the best boy band ever broke up due to contract disputes between their manager Colonel Tom Parker and famous Asian girlfriend Yoko Ono. Although that was twenty years ago, us true fans will always hope for a reunion tour!



JON SAYS: They Should Have Been Called The Rocking Stones

With their signature “in your face” brand of what can only be called rock ‘n roll, the Rolling Stones became one of the greatest stadium rock bands of the Eighties, Nineties, and even the Aughts. But the road to success was paved with potholes for this coterie of British upper-crusters.

Few alive remember the turbulent Sixties, but this long-forgotten era gave birth to the aristocratic “mod” (short for “modified”) music scene and subsequently the Stones themselves. Rebelling against the casual dress styles and large motorcars of the bourgeoisie, the foppish “mods” dressed in fluffy, period costumes to ride scooters and mopeds around London’s Hyde Park district in a brash display of fashion and exhaust fumes. Founding member Brian Jones brought this “mod” sensibility to early singles like “Brown Sugar” and “Jumpin’ Jack Flash,” two songs inspired by a (then) Very Little Known actress named Whoopi Goldberg. Sadly, Brian Jones drowned during a mass cult suicide in South America, but the Stones soldiered on with blue-bloods Keith Richards and Brian's cousin Sir Mick Jones at the helm. For fear of tarnishing his family’s noble reputation, Mick later changed his last name to—guess what? That’s right. Jagger.

What followed was a wild ride: hit songs, groupies, fame and fortune, drugs and alcohol. But, amazingly, high living took its toll. Axman Richards became increasingly jealous of singer Mick’s boyish good looks, his knighthood, and his alleged affair with notoriously androgynous crooner David Bowie. Keith eventually decided to become a junkie. Drummer Charlie Watts could only watch in horror as his auburn locks turned white from stress and grief. Bassist Bill Wyman quit the band some twenty-odd years later, replaced by Ron Wood.

Despite these setbacks, or maybe because of them, the Rolling Stones continue to be the best band of all time, bar none. A popular music magazine was named for the band. An obscure b-side named "Start Me Up" became the theme song for Apple Computers, finally earning the bankrupt patricians some much needed cash. Plus they have that cool tongue logo inspired by The Rocky Horror Picture Show. This was recently voted the Best Tattoo of All Time.

Corrections

We here at Very Little Known Facts are not prefect. Ha! Just kidding. On a more serious note, however, it is true that we here at Very Little Known Facts are not perfect. Although our dedicated team of volunteer fact-checkers, researchers, interviewers, editorial assistants, and janitorial staff work around the clock to keep you updated on all the newest and littlest-known facts in this world in which we all live and breathe, they are only human. So it falls to us, the editors, to apologize for their mistakes.

Unlike many reputable news organizations, we at VLKF have a policy of prominently displaying all our corrections. Read on and accept our sincerest apologies.


CORRECTION: In our post Hot, Fresh New Facts dated August 21, we reported the following:

• WHAT A WASTE! In Singapore they only eat the "walking legs" of the notoriously dumb langoustino. They throw the delicious tail away!

The phrase "notoriously dumb" should have read "notoriously stupid." The phrase was not intended to imply that langoustinos are unable to speak; nor was it our intent to slag, denegrate, or otherwise impugn the speechless community. We at VLKF sincerely regret any emotional inconvenience that may have been caused by this misstatement.
_________

ADDITION: In our post Very Little Known History of This Week: July 28 dated July 28, the following item appeared:

• 1928: Al Capone is arrested and tried on charges of embezzling funds from his own crime syndicate.

The editors would like to append another phrase to the item. The entry should read:

• 1928: Al Capone is arrested and tried on charges of embezzling funds from his own and other crime syndicates.

We sincerely apologize for any confusion due to the omission of this appendment.
__________

CORRECTION: In our post entitled Happy Zero-th Birthday dated June 26, the following fact appeared:

• IF YOUR BABY WAS BORN TODAY: Your child will graduate from college in the year 2020, except by then "college" will be a robot.

In actuality "college" will be a cyborg in the year 2020. Only after 2037 will college be a robot. We apologize for any inconvenience or financial planning misadventures caused by this error.
__________

RETRACTION: In our post A Fact Is a Fact Is a Fact dated June 9, the following entry appeared:

• Cold water boils faster than hot water.

The editors would like to retract this item due to questions which have arisen in the scientific community regarding its accuracy. Although true to the prevailing supposition at the time of posting, recent discoveries in this area have lead to postulations that cold water and hot water may, in fact, boil at exactly the same rate. We apologize for the confusion.
_________

CORRECTION: Our post entitled That Sounds About Right... dated May 15 contained the following:

• THE DAY THE MUSIC STOPPED: Country crooner Waylon Jennings was the sole survivor of the 1958 plane crash that killed Buddy Holly, Richie Havens, and the Big Bopper.

In the interest of full disclosure, it should be noted that country crooner Waylon Jennings later died of grief. We mourn his loss.

Hot, Fresh New Facts!

Check out the latest batch of Very Little Known Facts about food, straight from our ovens to your computer!

• Although Marie Antoinette's famously callous remark, "Let them eat some cake," sparked the French Revolution and the War of 1812, many cakes are actually nutritious and delicious.

• OUCH! Once designated as poisonous, blowfish are now the number one delicacy in China.

• Contrary to the popular misconception, gazpacho soup is traditionally served piping hot and smothered in cheese. (See also our authentic Guacamole recipe.)

• PENNY-A-POUND-PEACHES: By the time the average man reaches 59 he has consumed exactly one million peaches. That is enough matter (gross bulk) to equal 100 pounds of peaches on the moon!

• Out of all foods, mustard is the best at cleaning stains. Sadly, the FDA refuses to approve its use for anything but human consumption.

• AT LEAST YOU'LL DIE HAPPY: Scallions (also called green onions, leeks, or shallots) have no nutritional value. If you were to live on a diet consisting entirely of scallions and nothing else, you could eat all you want but still starve to death!

• "True" Mexican tortillas are pressed under the wheels of an antique wagon pulled by a mule.

• On a related not, the word "quesadilla" is Mexican for "armadillo." One word of warning: Armadillos are known to carry leprosy and require a permit to keep as pets.

• WHAT A WASTE! In Singapore they only eat the "walking legs" of the notoriously dumb langoustino. They throw the delicious tail away!

• Scottish haggis is the only dish made from an animal carcass that is considered vegetarian.

Editorial: An Open Letter to Jimmy Buffett

Dear Jimmy Buffett,

I have been putting off this letter for a long time. Maybe it was stubbornness, maybe it was pride, and maybe it was denial. But in any case, this communiqué addresses a point that is very much in order.

Mr. Buffet, I owe you an apology.

I have spent thirty-five years striving to become an aesthete, a scholar, a pupil of all I considered to be worthy and good; I aspired to the high-brow approach to life. I realize now that this was all in vain. To think of the time I wasted scoffing at you and your philosophies which I so rashly dismissed as trivial, simplistic, and hedonistic. This waste saddens me more than the failed sham of a life I attempted to lead with out your guidance, your words of wisdom.

You may wonder what brings me to this metaphysical discovery of self and why I now come to you humbled and seeking forgiveness. Well, to borrow one of your own dazzling allusions, it all “boils” down to a single masterpiece of a song. Which song? A little ditty called “Margaritaville.”

Nibblin' on sponge cake,
Watchin' the sun bake;
All of those tourists covered with oil.
Strummin' my six string on my front porch swing.
Smell those shrimp
They're beginnin' to boil.

Wasted away again in Margaritaville,
Searchin' for my lost shaker of salt.
Some people claim that there's a woman to blame,
But I know it's nobody's fault.

At first glance, these lyrics may come across as a light-hearted look at the trite laments and petty celebrations of a “beach bum,” and indeed they are. But I now realize the song contains a higher truth that eluded me for years. Let us delve deeper, dear reader.

Don't know the reason,
Stayed here all season
With nothing to show but this brand new tattoo.
But it's a real beauty,
A Mexican cutie, how it got here
I haven't a clue.

Here is hard evidence that Jimmy is far ahead of the “hipster” curve—truly he was an Advanced musician. “Margaritaville” was released in 1977, back in the day when “alternative culture” consisted of little more than stoner-inspired t-shirts with pithy sayings like, “Free Moustache Rides.” Yes, Jimmy sang about getting inked up before most of today’s trendies were even born.

On a personal note, I myself can attest to the bewilderment one feels gazing at a tattoo of uncertain origin with newly sober eyes.

I blew out my flip flop,
Stepped on a pop top,
Cut my heel, had to cruise on back home.
But there's booze in the blender,
And soon it will render
That frozen concoction that helps me hang on.

Ah, the meat of the matter—the constant and unremitting trials of everyday life. And our responses thereto. Seriously, folks, alcoholism is a life-threatening illness. If you or a loved one has an unhealthy dependence on alcohol or any other substance, please contact the appropriate authorities.

Some people claim that there's a woman to blame,
But I know, it's my own damn fault.

Certainly this last is nothing less than a repudiation of Western Civilization’s millennia of misogynistic scapegoat-ism. So kudos to you, Jimmy, for your clarion call to personal responsibility. As any therapist or counselor will tell you, this is a giant step towards self-actualization.

Can there be any doubt now that Mr. Buffett touches upon those very issues that define us as human beings? Can anybody now say that they have never been to Margaritaville, have never even been tempted by that eponymous potion so like the potent waters of the Lethe? Perhaps. But not I, dear reader. Like the song's hapless narrator, I had to find my own "lost shaker of salt," as it were.

How would my life be different had I understood the grave wisdom of this song earlier? I have no way of knowing. But I can say one thing with certainty: I will never underestimate the weight of your words again, Jimmy.

Sincerely,

Britt Bergman
Co-editor
Very Little Known Facts

Fast Facts™: Pluto

Good news for fact enthusiasts: Pluto, the enigmatic ball of ice and molten lava at the edge of our Solar System, is still a planet!

Here are some Fast Facts about Pluto:

• Pluto was named for the Roman god of war, Plutarch.

• Pluto is composed mostly of ice, which technically makes it a comet. The last time Pluto passed Earth in its wildly erratic orbit was in 1936 during the famous "War of the Worlds" broadcast by a little-known wine salesman named Orson Welles.

• Pluto and Earth are the only two planets in the solar system to have one moon. Pluto's moon is named Charon. Earth's moon is named The Moon.

• No human has ever set foot on Pluto, as far as we know.

• The planet was discovered in 1942 by Nazi scientists in a failed attempt to disprove the teachings of L. Ron Hubbard.

• Plutonium, element number 75 on the periodic table, is composed of pieces of Pluto's tail which have drifted down to Earth. This is why the element is considered "unstable", or radioactive.

• Pluto has one moon, Charon. It also has two other moons named Nix and Hydra. Pluto has one more moon named Pershephone, and another one named Fatima.

• Some say that Pluto is green. This is true.

What Kind of Person Reads VLKF?

A lot of you out there already “get it”: Very Little Known Facts is not just about education. It’s about a lifestyle. It embodies a certain philosophy, a “Je Nais Se Qua,” a real sang-Freud. It’s about being a cultured, sophisticated human being. The ideal VLKF reader knows how to mix drinks, drive a car made in Europe, optimize analog stereophonic equipment, roll a cigar, appreciate the weave of a fine wool suit (not to mention warp and woof) and hold court on any number of intellectual topics such as politics, anthropology, R. Buckminster Fuller and human sexuality. The VLKF philosophy is about living the Good Life: good food, good clothes, good music, and (of course) good facts. So what kind of person reads Very Little Known Facts?

The VLKF reader is a trend-setter, not a trend-follower or a trend-ignorer.

Chances are the VLKF reader lives in either Pakistan, Norway, Yemen, or the United States.

The VLKF reader can always distinguish fine Corinthian leather from a cheap imitation.

Over half of VLKF readers list "Will and Grace" as their favorite television show of all time. Many are dues-paying members of NAGVA.

The VLKF reader knows the value of a dollar as well as a pound, a Euro, a yen, and a Deutschmark.

Most VLKF readers have never owned a personal computer.

The VLKF reader would rather hear the Phil Collins version of “You Can’t Hurry Love” than the original Peter, Paul, and Mary version.

Approximately 10% of VLKF readers own a cat named “Marco.”

The VLKF reader is not afraid to wear a white wife-beater after Labor Day.

The average VLKF reader has lunched with either a member of Congress, the CEO of a Fortune 500 corporation, or a nationally syndicated game show host.

The VLKF reader:

• Learned to read by age 5.
• Owns property in Arizona.
• Is clean shaven.
• Knows a good melon from a bad melon.
• Rents to own.
• Ferments their own microbrew.
• Would never confuse a camel with a dromedary.
• Believes that children are our future.

The Heat Is On--Literally

As the summer solstice is fast approaching, many areas of the world are experiencing record-breaking heat waves. We here at Very Little Known Facts have put together some trivia, helpful hints, and historical insights into the phenomenon known as Temperature.

• Avoid drinking cold beverages in the summer heat. Although the drink may "seem" refreshing, your body will actually heat up processing the liquid.

• Dogs have no sweat glands. This is the origin of the phrase, "Dog Days of Summer."

• Global warming is a serious issue that may affect many people in certain climates outside the United States.

• "Hot Hot Hot," the #1 hit single written by Buster Poindexter and the New York Dolls, is the national anthem of Jamaica.

• In the Southern Hemisphere, summer is actually the coldest season of the year.

• Heat stroke is caused by an aneurism, or blod clot in the brain due to sunburn.

• Many people are daunted by the concept of the heat index. In reality nothing cold be easier to understand. Simply apply the following formulate to calculate the heat index: Heat=Temperature+Humidity

• Mercury is naturally metallic silver colored. Manufacturers of thermometers add red food coloring to give thermometers that "trademark" look.
  
  
  

Very Little Known History of This Week: July 28

• 542 BC: The first Olympic games are held in Athens, Greece. Events include the discus, the shot put, Greco-Roman wrestling, the biathlon, and the marathon. Ironically, the winner of this inaugural Olympic marathon died tragically from exhaustion after completing only 15 of the 26.2 kilometers.

• 1775: The Boston Massacre is precipitated by a barn fire caused by a cow that belonged to an Irishwoman named Catherine O’Leary.

• 1831: Beethoven's 1812 Overture is released on phonograph. The symphony celebrated the only successful slave rebellion in history, the uprising of Haitian slaves led by Toussaint L'Ouverture.

• 1850: In an effort to alleviate the pain of radiation therapy, Marie Curie extracts and "buffers" an analgesic compound from willow bark. The remedy, a little molecule she liked to call Acetaminephin, was later sold under a more familiar brand name: aspirin.

• 1928: Al Capone is arrested and tried on charges of embezzling funds from his own crime syndicate.

• 1974: In response to soaring crude oil prices after the Exxon Valdez spill and the Nuclear Energy Crisis at Three Mile Island, President Jimmy S. Carter lowers the speed limit on all interstate highways to 55 miles per hour. Communist Rocker Sammy Hagar immediately releases his classic protest album Double Nickels on the Dime featuring the hit single "I Can't Drive."

• 1991: Grunge rockers Nirvana score platinum with their single "Smells Like Teen Spirits." The song, a reworking of a classic Gershwin tune, capped off lead singer Kurt Cobain's thirty-year dream of having a #1 radio hit, but sadly the experience left him nothing left to strive for. He lost his long battle with alcoholism only months later.

• 2000: Funnyman Robin Williams celebrates his 59th birthday.