Thursday, August 10, 2006

What Kind of Person Reads VLKF?

A lot of you out there already “get it”: Very Little Known Facts is not just about education. It’s about a lifestyle. It embodies a certain philosophy, a “Je Nais Se Qua,” a real sang-Freud. It’s about being a cultured, sophisticated human being. The ideal VLKF reader knows how to mix drinks, drive a car made in Europe, optimize analog stereophonic equipment, roll a cigar, appreciate the weave of a fine wool suit (not to mention warp and woof) and hold court on any number of intellectual topics such as politics, anthropology, R. Buckminster Fuller and human sexuality. The VLKF philosophy is about living the Good Life: good food, good clothes, good music, and (of course) good facts. So what kind of person reads Very Little Known Facts?

  • The VLKF reader is a trend-setter, not a trend-follower or a trend-ignorer.

  • Chances are the VLKF reader lives in either Pakistan, Norway, Yemen, or the United States.

  • The VLKF reader can always distinguish fine Corinthian leather from a cheap imitation.

  • Over half of VLKF readers list "Will and Grace" as their favorite television show of all time. Many are dues-paying members of NAGVA.

  • The VLKF reader knows the value of a dollar as well as a pound, a Euro, a yen, and a Deutschmark.

  • Most VLKF readers have never owned a personal computer.

  • The VLKF reader would rather hear the Phil Collins version of “You Can’t Hurry Love” than the original Peter, Paul, and Mary version.

  • Approximately 10% of VLKF readers own a cat named “Marco.”

  • The VLKF reader is not afraid to wear a white wife-beater after Labor Day.

  • The average VLKF reader has lunched with either a member of Congress, the CEO of a Fortune 500 corporation, or a nationally syndicated game show host.

  • The VLKF reader:
    • Learned to read by age 5.
    • Owns property in Arizona.
    • Is clean shaven.
    • Knows a good melon from a bad melon.
    • Rents to own.
    • Ferments their own microbrew.
    • Would never confuse a camel with a dromedary.
    • Believes that children are our future.


    Alice said...

    Though it’s widely believed that Joan of Arc died of grief, she actually – tragically - choked on her own vomit.

    Jon Black and Britt Bergman said...

    Dear Alice,

    Thanks for your comment! The time-honored fable of Joan of Arc is certainly a cautionary tale, one that should give each of us pause as we live our daily lives every day on this planet on which we all live, Earth. Thanks again for your comment!

    Anonymous said...

    This VLKF reader is actually from Wales, (the non-England if you like)and owns no property in Arizona, spends her pounds like crazy, believes children are indeed the future but that the future is not orange, and hates cats.
    However, i do like little known facts, so thanks for that!

    Jon Black and Britt Bergman said...

    Dear anonymous,

    Thanks for your comment! However, we feel compelled to point out that Wales is not in Arizona. It is actually located in Scotland. Thanks again for your comment!